the dart season is in full swing, and it’s about time to post up a little info on how things are progressing.

Standings

Team Trout 11-1

Ed’s Team 7-5

Team Muff 5-7

Corey’s Crew 1-11

and on a personal level, here is a glimpse at the high averages . . .

Ed - 42.8
Muff - 41.3
Chrissy Schu - 40.6
Zig - 39.5
Doug - 38.4
Joe Swatski - 37.2
Corey - 35.6
Nate Dobeck - 34.8
Jon P - 34.2

High Game of the Season so far is a 55, hit by Chrissy Schu

Saturday while Penn State was beating up on the Wisconson Badgers (sorry Scrollie), 5 different teams were competing in a round robin dart tournament.

while all the teams were evenly matched, the hot hands of the afternoon belonged to the team of D. Zigler and M Sinkovich.  they went through the tournament beating everyone they faced until the gained a lead that could not be overcome by any of the others. 

so, a round of congratulations goes out to the winners of the season’s first dart tournament, Zig and Sinko.

comes from, of all places, Joe Paterno.  i’m copying this from fanNation.com’s blurb on Joe’s “Road Rage” incident . . .

According to the sources, Paterno said after his close call he pulled his car over to the curb and got out. He then approached the other vehicle and shook his finger at the driver. He warned her to, “Watch it.” “Be careful,” Paterno said. “I have your license number, and I will call the police on you.”

 According to the sources, Paterno said a male passenger then walked up and chastised him, saying, “That’s my wife you’re talking to.”

Paterno said, “That’s your problem.” 

things are growing around here.  we whittled a list of 30 names down to 28 to make a set of four 7-man dart teams.  we haven’t shot 7 man teams since the Shamokin League, and a lot of the young guys don’t remember those days. 

here are the lineups:

Team Hepler

Corey Hepler

Jow Swatski

John Polites

Tim Wargo

George Leshock

Jon Jon

Cookie

Team Trout

Doug Troutman

Chrissy Schu

Gary Kozak

Nate Dobeck

Josh Mall

Mikey Z.

Brownie

Team Dormer

Ed Dormer

Joe Remash

Lukie

Joe Zaharik

Randy K.

Aaron

Deke

Team Muff

Danny Lawler

Zigler

Fatty

Al Maschal

Eric Trocki (T. Rock)

John Gilbert

John Remash

action starts at 7:30, with NO grace period for late showings.  i’ll try to work up averages for everyone because if you show late, they’ll be using your average for the first game. and yes, we will be having opening night Burgers in Sauce.

from Lon Morris 

great things are happening, starting now!

tonight begins the high school football season with a contest against Biglerville.  i’ll be putting up a link to the forums at Eastern Penn Live because they seem to thave the best banter focused on area high school football.  you’ll be able to click on through and count the times someone says we should fire brennan at your on convenience. 

DARTS - the sign up sheet is alive and active.  there is also a sign-up sheet for the dart team party.  if you plan on attending (locust gap - sept 22 (confirm at bar)) please sign up so we can have a semi-accurate count for menu planning.  significant others are welcome. 

BOWLING - the bowling team shirts have arrived, true to the motto of “better late than never”.  there are enough shirts to cover the backs (and fronts) of the team members, and a mere handful available for sale.  as the initial run, these are sure to be collector’s items available in either XL or XXL. 

YOUTUBE - after receiving a gem from Rich Persing, i decided this needed to be on youTube.  so, i’ve opened what will eventually be the Dorkos.com youtube channel.  look for more info on that endeaver as it develops.  in the meantime, here’s the video that started it all . . .

oh yeah . . .

PHILLIES - congrats for their sweep of the Mets.  i haven’t heard that much enthusiasm for baseball in a long time.  i  know they’re just going to end it all by missing the playoffs by a game, but right now it feels good to be a fan!

Football season will be kicking off in earnest shortly, and right on the heels of that will be darts.

Dart sign-ups for the fall season will open tomorrow.  The season itself begins with draft night on Tuesday during fair week (no darts are shot on draft night, we just pick the teams).

The first games of the season are Tuesday following the Bloomsburg Fair.

That announcement being made, I’d like to reiterate that we play American Darts, not pub darts. The following video is an example of pub darts at it’s finest, well, kindof . . .

from the email box of Frank Pet.

from the desk of the Venerable Joe Stone . . .

this one comes compliments of Joe Stone.  he sends lots of good stuff . . .

Rodney Dangerfield Jokes:

My wife only has sex with me for a purpose. Last night she used me to time an egg.

It’s tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won’t drink from my glass!

Last night my wife met me at the front door. She was wearing a sexy negligee. The only trouble was, she was coming home.

A girl phoned me and said, “Come on over. There’s nobody home.” So, I went over… Nobody was home!

A hooker once told me she had a headache.

I went to a massage parlor. It was self service.

If it weren’t for pickpockets, I’d have no sex life at all.

I was making love to this girl and she started crying. I said, “Are you going to hate yourself in the morning?” She said, “No, I hate myself now.”

I knew a girl so ugly that she was known as a two-bagger. That’s when you put a bag over your head in case the bag over her head comes off.
I knew a girl so ugly, they use her in prisons to cure sex offenders.

My wife is such a bad cook, if we leave dental floss in the kitchen the roaches hang themselves.

I’m so ugly I stuck my head out the window and got arrested for mooning.

The other day I came home and a guy was jogging, naked. I asked him, “Why?”
He said, “Because you came home early.”

My wife’s such a bad cook, the dog begs for Alka-Seltzer.

I know I’m not sexy. When I put my underwear on I can hear the Fruit-of-the-Loom guys giggling.

My wife is such a bad cook, in my house we pray after the meal.

My wife likes to talk on the phone during sex; Why… Just last night she called me from Chicago.

My family was so poor that if I hadn’t been born a boy, I wouldn’t of had anything to play with.