Murphy’s Laws
from the email box of Rich Persing . . .
1. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
2. He who laughs last, thinks the most slowly.
3. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
4. Those who live by the sword, get shot by those who don’t.
5. Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.
6. The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there’s a 90% probability you’ll get it wrong.
7. If you lined up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be stupid enough to try to pass them, five or six at a time, on a hill,in the fog.
8. When you go into court, you are putting yourself in the hands of 12 people who weren’t smart enough to get out of jury duty.
9. The things that come to those who wait will be the things left by those who got there first.
10. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day, drinking beer.
11. Flashlight: A metal tube used to store dead batteries.
12. The shin bone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room.
13. A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.
14. Any tool dropped while working on a vehicle…will inevitably be found in the vehicles exact geographic center.
15. There is no such thing as “idiot proof”. The world will ALWAYS build a bigger idiot.
16. Anything that is cut to length will usually be too short.
