Triangle Paper Football Contest

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Sunday afternoon, around 4 o’clock. I’ll supply the official goalposts, and official paper that you can use to make footballs. I’ll also have a handful of footballs made in case your origami skills are completely lacking.

It’s a TOURNAMENT – Double elimination. So, you pick a pill, and your name goes onto a space in the bracket. Just like a dart tournament. If you lose a match, you go into the loser’s bracket. If you lose there, you’ll be free to dedicate all of your attention to drinking, or whatever.

The match begins with a coin flip. Whoever wins gets the chance to put the goalpost wherever they wish and set the conditions for the kick (there will be a fan or two to provide wind if desired).  The conditions do not include the manner in which the paper football is held or struck.  They affect the kick before, but not after the goalposts.

So, saying “kick from this beer coaster, through the uprights, and land in Grem’s fries” is not a valid set of conditions as Grem’s fries, or what’s left of them, will be located in a spot the football would land on AFTER going through the goalposts.  Saying “kick it from this beer coaster, off of the paper cutout of a baby chicken, through the goalposts” would be a valid set of conditions.

If player #1 makes the kick, player #2 must attempt the same kick.

  • If Player #2 makes it, no letters are awarded and and Player #2 now gets to take the lead shot in the next round
  • If Player #2 misses, they are awarded a penalty letter (the word is O-U-T). Player #1 keeps the power of shooting first, but they may not repeat any shots they made a point with.

The first player to spell the word O-U-T with their penalty letters loses.

The official paper is just printer paper, 8.5″ x 11″.  Make some footballs at home and see if you can hit the cat with them.  It’s all good.  I just didn’t want someone showing up with corrugated paper with a styrofoam inside and dominating based on superior equipment.  That’s all.

The goalposts are roughly 12″ wide, give or take, in case you’re curious.

Entry Free = $0


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The Start of the 2nd Half

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Hey, it’s SATURDAY.  That means a couple of things.  First off – a round of well wishes go out to Joe Zaharick, Bob Shirey and Mark Rohlfing as they shoot this afternoon in the Chambersburg dart tournament under the Dorko’s banner.  Good Luck Guys!

We started out the second half of the Fall dart league on Thursday.  On the Front board, there was a fluctuation in the fabric of time/space, and strange things happened. Tanney shot a 22, Team Captain Joe Zaharick shot a 21.  Skinner shot an entire game where he put up at least two points EVERY Inning.  In fact, HE LED ALL SHOOTERS that game with a 36!!

That’s why we play the games instead of just talk about them!  The team results after Game 1 had Team Schu taking a 114 – 110 win.

Skinner blacked out the very first inning of the second game, but that was the only mark against him on the score sheet.  He went on to put up  a 31 game, for back to back 30 offerings. Randy K led shooters in Game 2 with a 33, and Team  Zaharick took advantage of a crappy 9th inning from Team Schu to win 116 – 111.  There would be no sweeping going on on the Front Board tonight.

In the bully game of the match Tanney showed once again showed a combination of patience and generosity.  He waited until the 9th inning to take his score into double-digit territory – adding 4 points to his total of 7 for an 11 game.  By making use of four blackout innings and two single point innings, he was able to put together the most generous game of the night as well.

You can either be generous to your team, or the league.  And while Tanney was being generous to the league, his team was still in the hunt for a victory.  At the end of the 9th inning, they had a 13 point lead with Team Joe Z holding darts.  When captain Joe Z took the line as the final shooter, he was looking at a 5/6 situation.  Considering that of the 26 innings he had shot so far that night, he put up 5 or better 5 times, it looked like Team Schu had about an 80% chance of victory.  BUT NO!  Joe Z lands the 6 for the win!  The final score was 106 – 105.

and perhaps more importantly, Skinner sweeps Tanney for the evening and Jumps Over Him in the Player Rankings!!  BIG changes on Day#1 of the 2nd half!

On the Back board 1st half champs faced off against the team that Bodog has as their most likely threat to repeating, Team Troutman.

In Game #1 Team Troutman moved out into the leading the first stanza, but Team Wargo came back.  By the end of the 4th inning everything was tied up on the scoreboard.  Then Team Wargo crept out into the lead and stayed there until the end.  Zig was high shooter of the game with a 38, followed by Doug’s 37.  Game 1 finished at 121 -112.

In Game 2 Team Wargo nearly repeated their team score, putting up 122.  This time however, Team Troutman had some 9th inning heroics.  Going into the bottom of the 9th, Team Troutman trailed by 15.  After Hawk/Doug/Cowboy put up 5/4/5, anchorman Mike Kerrick took the line.  He put the final nails in, adding 6 points of his own and pushing his team to a 127 – 122 victory!

That may have pissed off Team Wargo.  In the final game of the match Timmy found his stride putting up his best game of the night (37).  Zig matched his high game of the night (38), and Boyer put up the best game of the night for any shooter with a 41!  They took the bully game 143 – 126.

Langton bested Boyer in the first game of the night in their head-to-head rivalry, but couldn’t match his efforts in games 2 and 3.  Boyer takes the night 2 – 1.  As an side, in a mid-week interview, Langton said that Boyer is good at darts.  I’m not sure exactly what that means, but it’s worth putting in print.

Both Boyer and Hawkins are exactly one tenth of a point behind Zaharick in the standings.  All three are ahead of Tony Ford.  What changes will Week Two bring?


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The first half of the Fall dart action for 2014 has come to a close.  Team Wargo went into the night with their destiny in their own hands.  They faced off against Team Schu on the back board.

In game 1, Team Wargo stumbled out of the gate and Team Schu did not.  By the end of the first stanza, Team Schu had opened up a 19 point lead, and never looked back.  They took the first game 127 – 119 with Chrissy leading shooters with a 41.

In game 2, Boyer exploded.  He took his 32 average and tossed it to the side, unleashing a series of innings that went 9-6-6-6-7-5-4 before finally slowing down in the 9th.  His final score?  A FIFTY!!!  He led shooters for the game, and the night with that score, and his team took game 2 and the first half title 144 – 118!

In the final game of the series, players were shooting for pride.  Boyer kept up his strong play, finishing the night with a 42 game.  Tanney, on the other hand, was just finished.  He showed patience by waiting until the 7th inning to break into the double digits with his score.  He then chose to coast through the rest of the innings and finish with an even 10 game.  That performance was the most generous game of the evening at $1.35.

In Game 3 Team Wargo poured it on with the lowest score on their team being a 34.  They won 151 – 111.

On the Front board, Joe Z’s team showed up even though he didn’t.  They faced Team Troutman, who have the new 37 shooter Joe Hawkins in their line up.  In Game 1, Hawkins hit a 37.  How can you make that up?  He led shooters for the game.  Joe Z led his team from the jobsite with a 33.  That wasn’t enough though, and Team Trout took the first game 125 – 105.

In Game 2 Joe Z led his team again. This time Hawkins tossed something other than a 37 (a 30), and Doug Troutman chipped in 40 points leading his team to their second win of the evening 124 – 115.

In the last game of the night, Randy Ponytail took over the top shooter spot for Team Zaharick with a 39.  He led them to a team score of 123, but that fell shy of the 136 spot put up by Team Troutman.  Team Troutman swept the match!

In the end, the important stats were

  • Boyer 2 Langton 1,
  • Tanney 2 Skinner 1, and
  • 1st half champs are Boyer, Snoz, Timmy and Zig!!

Boyer hops over Tony Ford on the leaderboard.  Timmy Wargo drops to 8th.  Skinner and Tanney are separated by one tenth of a point.

And next week we start all over again!!

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Trivia Trophy Hostage Situation

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The Team Trivia trophy situation has entered it’s 33rd day.  We’ve called in an advisor . . .

Our Lad has had experience in dealing with hostage takers before, and assures us that even at this point in the game, there is still hope for a peaceful resolution.  He points out that his 2002 Nobel Peace Prize gives him insight into how to resolve situations without conflict, and he also pointed out the the Molly Maguires aren’t taking on any new cases anyway.

See how sad everyone looks without the trophy?  it’s like a hollow victory on a Monday Night.  Well, hollow but with money, and beer, and chicken sandwiches.  So it’s not completely hollow.  More like hollow like those russian dolls that fit inside of each other hollow.

Until Monday, let’s enjoy a clip from Cars, where Paul Newman played the role of Doc Hudson . . .

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Team YES says – YES!!  We ARE ready for some Sunday Sunday Game Ball action!!

Big Daddy handed the Game Ball off to Elyse three weeks ago.

And, in a move that saw the Game Ball remain in the hands of a Lady, Elyse handed it off to Mel.  You can listen in as she broke the news to her family!

After being invigorated by receiving the Game Ball, Mel put on another fun filled performance and managed to win the Game Ball for a SECOND Week in a Row!


This Sunday anything can happen.  Word on the wind is that the Riot Punchbowl may be making an appearance, and that can change the spirits of the Game Day participants. Add the burgers designed by Sinko (fried eggs, bacon AND burgers?) and there are certainly stories in the making.

Interested in winning the Game Ball? Here are some ideas (and these are only starting points)

  • Bring cupcakes, or a soupie, or deer balogna, or some smoked salmon, or boilo
  • Learn your team’s fight song, and sing it when they score paydirt
  • Do a push-up for each point your team has every time they score (yes, this counts for Vikings, Jets and Raiders fans)
  • Dress up to make a Rabid Raider’s fan look like a punk



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Costumes galore!

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It’s been a week, and it looks like we’ve had a high rate of survival for those who attended one of last week’s Halloweekend Parties!

On Friday, DJ Big Daddy did indeed rock the house!  There wasn’t time to catch a photo of every costume, but I did get some shots of the winners.

This pair of creepy clowns took the couples costume award!

The prize packages for creativity went to the Jager-Bomber . . .


and Walter White left his mark on the party!

For creativity and costume creation skills, the night’s winner of best costume goes to the Game Ball!

Winner of the Best Costume in the “guys, this is NOT a costume” category . . . Paul Bunyan!


Paul Bunyan was a BIG fan of the Riot Punch . . .


On Saturday the Cosmic Wheels rolled through and partied!  Once again there was so much action that catching all of the costumes on film was impossible.  A few of the highlights I caught include . . .

The Real as the “the baby” . . .

The costumes that really stood out were the Pumpkinseed Couple, who wore pumpkins on their heads!

And, time best spent in the makeup chair goes to Edward Scissorhands!



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That’s right – FRIDAY NIGHT is Halloween and SATURDAY is just too good of a day NOT to Party, so we’re just going to Party All Halloweekend!


FRIDAY – The weekend kicks off with DJ Big Daddy starting at 10pm.  The feeling of Halloween will have crept into the air . . . .

Can you wear a costume?  You bet!

And will there be prizes?  You Bet!  $50 for best costume of the evening, $50 to the best couples costume of the evening.

We’ll be busting out some special drinks and rolling back a few prices!  Add in some games, some giveaways, and hot dance floor and it’s definitely a party!


SATURDAY – The COSMIC WHEELS roll on down the line starting at 10pm!

Can you wear a costume?  You bet!

And will there be prizes?  You Bet!  $50 for best costume of the evening, $50 to the best couples costume of the evening.

More special drinks! More price rollbacks! More games and prize baskets!

If the Wheels hit the end of the line, DJ Big Daddy will be ready to jump in when the Clock Strikes Midnight and take us home!  Well, take us to 2am, when it’s time to to hit the Sonny’s :)  They ARE rolling back the clocks this weekend, right?  And if you make it until the $20 breakfast at Shicky’s, don’t worry.  What happens are Shicky’s stays at Shicky’s.  Or on Snapchat, I’m not exactly sure.

And no worries, because we start all over again for Sunday Funday!  and here is . . . .

CLUE #1 - On How To Win the GAME BALL – show up to Sunday Funday in a Halloween Costume ;)

CLUE #2 – Bring Cupcakes (Ditchy, you’re a bum.  Joe Z, you’re a bum too.)

CLUE #3 – bring a pumpkin carved with your favorite team’s emblem, or some such thing.


But I only have One Costume and want to make sure I hit the Fun! – ah ha!  Simple answer, grab a red T-shirt and dress as the Boyer’s Bandit on Friday.  If we have enough Bandits, we’ll do a line-up!  Then, spend two hours on Saturday in the make-up chair.




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A Night in the 30′s

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There was plenty of action this Tuesday night.  The Flyers took on the Stanley Cup Champion Los Angeles Kings and WON, the Penguins bested the New Jersey Devils, The Royals even pushed the World Series to a 7th game by lambasting the Giants.  AND we shot darts!

On the Front board the squads of Chrissy Schu and Joe Zaharick met.  In the first game, Team Zaharick jumped out to a lead in the first inning, and never looked back.  Chrissy Schu put up 42 points in a 126 – 112 defeat.  Skinner chipped in a 32 game for the winners.

In the second game of the match, Skinner threw another 32 game.  Joe Z’s hand was heating up as he tossed a 44, and his team won game #2 137 – 113.

In last game Joe Z tossed a 47, which was high game for the night.  Skinner completed his “Night in the 30′s” with a 31 game.  On the other side, Tony Ford took up Skinner’s usual duty of contributing to the kitty.  Tony tossed the evening’s most generous game – a 13 point, 85 cent offering.  Team Zaharick never trailed during the match, and won the third game convincingly 147 – 94.

Comparing Skinner’s score to Tanney’s average score, Skinner swept Tanney 3 – 0 . . . .


On the back board the team with the hottest hands, Team Wargo, took on Team Troutman.  Cowboy and Snoz both threw 36′s in the first game, canceling each other out on the scorecard.  Doug’s 39 led shooters in the game, but that wasn’t enough as Team Wargo finished with a 124 – 122 victory.

Joe Hawkins joined Team Troutman for the second game, replacing Mark Ambrose.  He immediately shot over his head, putting up 37 points and propelling his team to a 135 – 128 win!

In the final game of the match, hawk put up another 37 – which should put him high on the leaderboard.  But this time, it wasn’t nearly enough.  The LOWEST shooters on Team Wargo threw 37′s (Boyer and Snoz), Zig tossed a 38 and Timmy threw a 40 for a season high 152 team score.  Final score 152 – 137.

Joe Z had the high series for the night – 129 points (38, 44, 47).

In head to head action between Boyer and Langton, Boyer took 2 out of 3 (28-22, 24-29, 37-24).  And we ended up with BBQ in the crock pot since the weather came straight out of June.

The first half of the season wraps up next Tuesday Night!  And – if you’re looking for a little more dart action (for fun, not a formal “team” setting), they are shooting random draw one night tournaments on Monday Nights at the Natalie Fire Company.  Send a shout out to Joe Hawkins, Doug or Joe Remash for more info.


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we are up to 53 as high game

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The big news from last night’s dart scene – Sausage Hoagies.  You gotta respect the roaster.  Other news includes . . .

Action on the Back board between Team Wargo & Team Zaharick.  The first time they met, in the first week of the season, Team Zaharick came away with a 2 games to 1 edge.

In the first game, Ponytail tossed a 47 and Joe Z put up 42.  But that wasn’t enough as Team Wargo combined for 144 points, and took the game 144 – 137.  In the second game, Team Zaharick stumbled out of the blocks and fell behind by 8 points in the 1st inning.  They never recovered.  While Skinner was wearing out the scorekeeper’s pencil (he started with two blackouts and added another one in the 9th for good measure – and yes, that’s the night’s most generous game), Zig was putting up a series of solid innings that saw themselves grow into a 53 Game!

That stands at the top of the High Score board for this, still young, season!

Game 2,  167 – 105 Team Wargo.  In the third game of the set Ponytail and Joe Z managed to get hot again with 46 and 41 games respectively.  But once again, that wasn’t enough.  Team Wargo put up another 144 score with everyone hitting in the 30′s.

On the Front board Team Troutman and Team Schu squared off.  The first game ended with a victory for Team Schu, 132 – 112.  In the second game Cowboy got hot, throwing a 37. But, Chrissy Schu was hotter, tossing a 46 helping his team to their second win of the night 140 – 127.  Despite losing, Team Troutman almost tossed the least kitty-friendly game of the night.  Their scoresheet was marred only by Mike Kerrick’s single in the 9th inning.

In the final game of the night, Team Trout finished the top of the 9th inning with an 18 point lead.  Tanney and Langton came up big in the inning, and gave Chrissy an opportunity to grab the win and take all three games with his final darts.  He needed 3 to tie/4 to win.  And the scoresheet says . . . . . . he shot a 2 in the inning.  The game goes to Team Troutman 128 – 127.

The tightest contest of the night may have been between Boyer and Langton.  Averaging a 29 going into the contest, Langton raised his game with scores of 34, 34 and 35.  Was that enough to grind Boyer’s gears into the dirt?  Well . . . not exactly.  Boyer took the first game 36-34, the second game 36-34, and Langton finally got the better of him in the last game 35-34.  Three games, a total margin of victory of five points.  Nice!  And we won’t even mention that Boyer blacked out the 9th inning in that 3rd game where he lost.

And the original battling duo – Skinner and Tanney?  They battled as well with Skinner taking the opening game 24-22, but dropping the next two 26-20 and 20-17.

Even with the 53, Zig only moved his average about a half point, so he still trails Doug on the leaderboard.  Zaharick slips past Boyer after this week, and Langton moves his average into the 30′s.

There are 6 more games (two weeks) to go in the first half of the season.  Action picks up again next Tuesday, also the Flyers East will be hosting the Flyers West (I mean L.A. Kings) on the tv’s.  I’m not sure what’s for dinner yet.

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Team Wargo uses the broom

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The 3rd week of dart action for the Fall of 2014 took place on Tuesday night with the Flyers on in the background (they tied the Ducks with some late-game heroics from Voracek), and Chicken Pot Pie in the roaster.

The front board had Team Schu and Team Wargo facing off against each other.  Tony Ford and Chrissy each hit 40 games in the opener, but that wasn’t enough to overcome the team effort from the Wargo crew, where everyone shot 30 or better.  Team Wargo took the first game 143-129.

In the 2nd game, everyone one Team Wargo hit in the 3rd inning, and they took a ten point lead and never looked back, winning 139 – 114.  The real drama came when Boyer’s undefeated streak vs Langton was put to the test.  Dave was shooting first, and took a 1 point lead into the 9th.  There, he managed a single point – giving Boyer “two to tie, three to win”.

Boyer’s first dart missed it’s mark.  His second dart went astray also.  So, with his final dart he could hit a red and tie the Langton, or perhaps hit a trip and steal a victory, keeping his streak alive!  The dart left his hand and landed in the board – missing every scoring area!  BLACKOUT!!!


To close out the action between these two teams took an extra inning.  Team Schu got their space together and put up a 142 game, their best of the evening.  Being the hammer shooter for Team Wargo, Zig walked up to the line in the bottom of the ninth with a “6 to tie, 7 to win” and put up 6 – forcing extra innings.  Team Wargo outscored Team Schu in the 10th, and took the third and final game.

The back board had Team Trout and Team Zaharick squaring off.  Cowboy put up a 40 in his first game of the evening, leading Team Trout to a 125 – 109 win.

Skinner threw the evening’s most generous game in Game 2 of the match, contributing $.95 to the kitty via three blackouts and a pair of one point innings.  While his 13 was not enough to push his team to victory (Team Zaharick dropped Game 2 122 – 106), it was Almost Enough to defeat Tanney in their head-to-head challenge.  But, Tanney prevailed 16 – 13.

In the final game of the match Cowboy gave Skinner a run for his money adding a trio of blackouts of his own, but he came up shy for most generous game of the night honors.  Team Zaharick managed to avoid the sweep, taking the final game 119 – 113.

The teams are all bunched together in the standings with everyone at either 5 – 4, or 4 – 5 after shooting each other once.  If I have my tallies right, Tanney leads Skinner 6 – 3 and Boyer leads Langton 8 – 1 in head to head action.

After this week, Tony Ford jumps over Chrissy Schu on the leaderboard by a tenth of a point.  37.4 – 37.3.  And Damien Zigler jumps over BOTH of them with his 38.8 average.  He threw high game of the night with a 48.  Ponytail hopped over Wargo, and Boyer is now in front of Zaharick as the captains fall in the rankings.

I’m not sure what’s in the roaster for next week yet.  I do know the Flyers take on the Blackhawks in the background, and there may be some World Series Game 1 action as well.



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